First Step

This weekend Randy and I got the news that good friends of ours who have been trying to get pregnant for a few months finally succeeded. While I am so very happy for them I still cried and beat myself up like I do every time. I wasn't home so they told Randy, but he asked me what they did to finally get pregnant. They started seeing an OB through the Plan First Medicaid program who put them on Clomid. When Randy found out the ends and outs of the process he told me we'd be trying the same thing.

On Tuesday I went to the Health Department to get a pap smear and apply for Plan First Medicaid. You can read up all about it here on our personal blog. I'll also repost it here.

Let me just start off by saying, I have heard terrible things about the Health Department. Not just ours, all government run health departments. I've heard they are dirty, loud, in bad parts of town, and other awful things. I've even heard that the doctors there are so awful they along will make you loose your child. Yep. That is why I've never been to the Health Department. Well, today I put on my big girl panties and I went to the health department. Let me just tell you, it was the best experience I've ever had in a doctors' office in my life. It was nice and clean and I was in and out in 2 hours. That seems like a while but I had to fill out new patient paperwork, go through a Medicaid consult, have blood work done, get a pap smear and apply for PlanFirst Medicaid. My waits in each waiting room were no more than 10 minutes max. The people were so kind and I was never made to feel like a bad person for being there. They were supportive and they listened to me and the best part, a different nurse would come in and say "Aw, you're trying to have a baby? That's wonderful." I didn't have to repeat myself a hundred times and they cared about why I was there. It wasn't about the money. They generally cared. I can not tell you how good it was to hear "Yes, there is something wrong. You have tried enough and you are doing everything right. Let's see what we can do to fix this." I know I'm not crazy. I knew something in my body wasn't right and it wasn't because God didn't want me to get pregnant, or that I wasn't being patient enough, or that I wasn't believing in the magical fairy dust enough, that something wasn't right. I knew it. Yes, I'm sure people are out there that just need to calm down and boom they get knocked up. Those people aren't me. I've had issues since I was 12 with endometriosis and it's been nearly 6 years since my last checkup. It feels to good to know I was right to be worried.

I didn't cry when they drew my blood (this seriously was a big worry) but they did have to use a peds butterfly needle and go through the top of my arm to be able find a vein. I did on the other hand tear up at the pap. Wow. That was kinda rough. The lady told me that she thinks I have scar tissue in my tubes and if I get accepted into the Plan First program I can see Dr. Daniels about treatment. I may have to have another surgery to get rid of the scar tissue, but hopefully after that we should be able to easily get pregnant. It will be amazing. It will take 2 weeks to find out if we qualify for the program. After that I'll have wait to get an appointment with the Dr. and from there find out the steps we need to take to get the ball rolling. I feel so much peace knowing we have options and a way to get past this. I wish I hadn't waited this long to ask for help. We could already have our little bit on the way. But I'm so grateful that we have information now and I'm hoping this leads us to exactly the goal we have been working so hard for.

Fingers crossed we get approved. If not this all stops here and I'm not sure what we'll do.

If all goes as planned in a couple of weeks we will start contacting OBGYNs to set up consults and decide who is the best fit for us to continue on this journey with. I'm not sure if they'll start us out with Colmid or if they'll check the possibility of scar tissue and checking my tubes. After the last 2 surgeries being so long ago I think that is such a strong possibility I don't really want to stall with anything else. I've heard so many success stories about women with Endometriosis getting their scar tissue taken out and getting pregnant the very next month. If I have to have another laparoscopy I think we have to wait 6-8 weeks before we can try again. Either way, I truly feel like this is the BEST option for us to move to the next step. I'll be so glad to get this waiting period over with to find out if we are approved or not so we can move on. This is the first step to a very long journey and I am beyond ready to begin.